The Relations Equation

I want to share this post with you. A very attractive girl...the type you see on hip hop videos and making Joe Blow drool into the storm drains of Melrose Blvd...left this notice of application in her myspace blog.

"HUSBAND APPLICATION <3current>

REQS & SPECS:

*UR LAST NAME MUST SOUND GOOD WITH MY FIRST NAME.
*CAR / CRIB / JOB / COLLEGE DEGREE [PERIOD. NO EXCEPTIONS. HUSTLING IS NOT A JOB]
*ATHLETIC [SO MY SON CAN PLAY IN THE MLB & BUY MAMA A HOUSE, LOL]
*GOOD LOOKING [FOR MY DAUGHTER'S SAKE, LOL]
*GOOD CREDIT
*FLEXIBLE SCHEDULE [I WANT TO BE ABLE TO TRAVEL WITH MY HUBBY ... PLUS, SUMTIMES I WANNA JUST HANG WITH HIM @ STRIP CLUBS TIL THE LATE HOURS
*NO FAMILY HISTORY OF CANCER OR DIABETES
*GENEROUS [IM STILL A PRINCESS & MIMI LOVES NEW SHOES LOL]
*BE A FAMILY MAN, LOVE KIDS, EAT MY SUBPAR COOKING [LOL], BE NEAT & TIDY, RESPECTFUL, AFFECTIONATE, HANDY AROUND THE HOUSE, CHRISTIAN, A GOOD COMMUNICATOR & HAVE A GOOD RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS MOTHER
*LIVES IN OR WILLING TO RELOCATE TO CALI OR MIA

*****IF ALL THIS APPLIES TO U & U'R STILL INTERESTED, PROCEED*****

NAME:
AGE:
LOCATION:
REASONS I SHOULD MARRY U:

COPYRIGHT 2008 MIMI INC ALL RIGHTS RESERVED "

I thought this was funny as shit! Kudos to her for having the balls to be truthful when most females will not be truthful with you or even themselves as to what they want. And it's not like this girl is completely superficial and filled her prerequisites with a bunch of negatives. She simply knows that she has exactly what men want. She is offering herself up on that pussy pedestal as Pussyliyah the Great in the flesh. Goddess of men's sexually deviant desires... dangling her nectar and setting a man trap in liquid crystal display. A beautiful woman is in high demand like gold with skyrocketing value in a slumping economy. Good Pussy stock is one commodity who's worth is through the roof at any time. Truly recession proof. Why would a woman not want to hold out for the highest bidder?

You may think that I am saying a woman has nothing else to offer to a man but her body. You are right! At least in most cases you are. There are other traits in a woman that make a relationship between man and woman bearable beyond sex. And these traits do boost a woman's stock into the upper echelon of prime value but I am not tackling this not because I am dealing with what I call the first response. The woman's first response in my view is called security. (i.e. strength, money, power, respect, genes, etc.) A woman is very perceptive and can tell all of these things just with a glance or by sniffing your cologne...lol. As a man if you can provide security in different areas a woman feels safe in trusting Pussyliyah to you on a regular basis. A man's first response is purely physical. I dare anyone to say different. Maybe your ass is just like the one I dream about. Maybe you dress that certain slutty way I like accentuating your curves and Beyonce thickness. Maybe your lips are just like that girl on that video or your hair is Hawaiian silky. Maybe you a slim goodie and I can imagine all the positions you can master but, my point is as a man the first response is all physical.

Let me ask you a question. Why do we as men get mad when that sports figure or entertainer walks into the club and the floor gets drained of all the baddest women that followed them to the VIP? If anything you should be grateful for that man revealing to you the secret to getting what you truly want. Pardon my frankness but if pussy is all you want then success will surely get it every time guaranteed. Even the most well grounded, educated, church going woman... who you may feel should see you for the man you truly are underneath the facade of a failure in life... wants a winner only in most cases. At least a confident man with goals and a plan set in motion to achieve them has a chance. This can be you.

You are a sorry excuse. Men...stop being a chump and get over it! I say this time and time again. If you are spending the majority of your time chasing women something is not right. Something is very wrong. Let that girls blog be a subtle hint to you as to how to tip the scales in your favor. This is all about increasing your value so that you are in demand as a man. Her checklist reads like specs to a car. I speak in car terms because I'm sure a man can understand this. If it's a sports car we want to know if it is a convertible...if it is a manual transmission...how many horsepower it has...what it's top speed is. Improve your specs gentlemen. Work on yourself first and know what you have to offer is on every woman's list. Then you can knock that pussy right off the pedestal and into your bed.

This is kind of a side note but important to demonstrate self worth. I met a woman who is unbelievably sexy and gorgeous. I honestly have to say this woman is as close to perfection as a woman gets in my eyes physically. Brown skinned creole with long hair down to an apple bottom. Model figure and a smile and personality that just oozes sex. Problem. She has a boyfriend. Did I let that stop me? No. She apparently comes around me because I have something that her boyfriend lacks. Unfortunately this woman has it in her mind that she can confide in me and give the other man the benefits of a relationship...the pussy. Soon as I realized this I had to let her know I'm not gay. A "gay friend" would support you emotionally while you go out and "support" another man physically. I cannot allow you to diminish my value So I got to step. I am confident she will be in my bed next week. **evil smile** If not, what I did do is reserve my manhood and boost my value in her eyes. Respect is demanded from the opposite sex but self respect is an absolute necessity.

At the end of the day I want you to think about something. This may sound very chauvinistic to those who the concept of reason hasn't graced with it's presence yet. For every beautiful woman that wouldn't talk to you, think about the degree you don't have. For every quality sexual encounter you missed in life, think of the lack of zeros in your account. Notice I said quality. I am an advocate of quality over quantity when it comes to women. For every opportunity you took with an average around the way girl just to get a notch on your belt, think of every opportunity you missed to advance yourself in life. Be concerned with your personal well being and others will automatically be concerned with you. Here's to getting yours'. Signing off...

HUMAN

So intellectual

Can't see the heavens for the clouds

So much brovado

Can't be humble for being proud

So cold

Can't feel the warmth of a loving heart

So high and mighty

Can't remember the struggle at the start

I myself was enamored at the fact that even once King Hatchet was a hammer

But know I can't be fooled

Because a lying man stutters and stammers in his own drool

So I check my tongue before I'm hung by a word

And project an image clear and defiant

Not sloven and slurred

For images can reflect the essence of the inner self

Material items are begat of money

But wisdom begats true wealth

So I ask you to ask yourself

Is confusion my true nature?

Is right and wrong a necessary paradox
Am I a hypocrite?
Have I learned anything I was taught?

Questions like these are raised when the carnal mind betrays

Just know that God creates perfection

By calibrating the best and worst of days

Translation...God is...what you aint'

So if you find that you can't understand

Let that be your only complaint

They say, "Let go and let God"

Well, isn't it odd that it seems like the hardest thing?

But at the same token I have been witness to blessings that allowed slaves to become kings

So if I say, "I want to be made whole"

It's because I don't even know the half

But, here's the thing...

How can I touch something in the physical...

When all I know is the dream?

Should I cop out?

Cop a new position?

Or just plain ol' cop a plea?

And tell you that I'm only human

And this is the best that we can possibly be.

Success Is The Best Revenge

Success is the best revenge. Focus on you in 2009 and all things will come to you. If you have a resolution let it be this. Stop chasin females! Get yourself right fellas and let them chase you. You been workin hard for the money for years. Now it's time to let that money work for you. Save and invest. Re-up and re-load. They talk about the law of attraction like it's a secret...package it up... book and CD in new age terms. These fools regurgitating old ideas getting rich off your simple minds.

Let me talk to Black folks for a second. Just cause you got a "G" don't mean you should buy that chain. That old Honda you got work pretty damn good don't it? You aint gotta buy that Benzo before you get a house. Huh? Yeah okay...look at me strange until you are rubbing bengay on them knees wondering where your life went. Get an education dammit! Success is the best revenge.

You tryin to play right now but need to learn how to sacrifice. Your future is worth it. I don't care what your goal is you have to have a plan to get there. So make one. Get what you want out of life and know how to get it.